Cool Quotes

The dialouge in 'The Practice' is always excellent.
However, a few quotes are absolutely unforgettable.

*BOBBY: I have to convince the jury that I'm making headway...and then I have to make headway.

*HELEN: Anyone can kill Lindsay, it's the circumstances that vary.
LINDSAY: Oh, now there's a proverb!

*EUGENE: (standing in the corridor of a prison) Alright everyone...listen up! Who in here, didn't do it? (prison errupt into many loud cries of 'I didnt do it!') That's what I thought!

*BOBBY: You think defending the guilty is scary Lindsay...wait until you get an innocent one....it's terrifying.

*LAWYER: Do I look like the idiot of the new millenium to you Miss. Dole?
LINDSAY: No, I see symtoms of intelligence.

*COP: Do I look scared
JIMMY: You're too stupid to be scared!

*JIMMY: Is there something I'm not getting here?
LUCY: It's Lindsay who's not getting it...from Bobby!

*REBECCA: You kissed Lucy
BOBBY: She kissed me!
REBECCA: You kiss Lindsay, you kissed Helen Gamble, there was that whiny thing in the short skirt (Ally McBeal), and now you kiss Lucy! (She swats him) What the Hell is wrong with you!
BOBBY: Rebecca!
REBECCA: We're about to face bankruptcy and you're running around kissing teenagers..Whats wrong with you!? (She swats him again)

*HELEN: (To Ally McBeal) Maybe you could eat a cookie.
ALLY: Maybe we could share it.

*LINDSAY: (RE: Ellenor) I think she needs a long vacation Bobby, with three votes we could give her one.

*BOBBY: You're a news reporter? Does that mean you were being hounorable, or was that the justification for being dishounorable?

*LINDSAY: Your case was already dismissed Ellenor
ELLENOR: Oh yes, Lindsay, take her side. I expect nothing more
LINDSAY: Hey!
EUGENE: This again?
ELLENOR: Why is she even here?
LINDSAY: To kick your ass like I did before
ELLENOR: Oh please

*REBECCA:(To Lindsay and Ellenor) What the hell is wrong with you two?
LINDSAY: Isn't it obvious? You said something she didn't like, and it's clearly my fault

*HELEN: (To Bobby and Lindsay) Do you guys brush first, or do you just go at it morning breath and all?

*LINDSAY: You could divest
EUGENE: It's too late, the rot is already in the wood
LINDSAY: Well why don't you just take your cut?
ELLENOR: You pissy little bitch
EUGENE: You know Lindsay, I've been trying to defend you, but it's getting harder and harder...
LINDSAY: Defend me against what...her (Ellenor)? Help somebody who needs it.
ELLENOR: (to Bobby) Is this what happens when you insert your penis? I'm just wondering....(At this stage Lindsay climbs across the conference table and tackles Ellenor off her chair.Then proceeds to strangle her. The fight moves to the outer office where the client Mr.Jacobs is waiting.)
JACOBS: It's none of my business, but you guys have a serious morale problem here.

*BOBBY: Lindsay, I've only had two dreams in my life. One was to pitch for the Redsox. The other was to meet and marry the most wonderful woman in the world. One from two isnt't bad. (Pause as she smiles brightly at him) Now, if we could just get you to take some medication for those mood swings...

*BOBBY: You asked for my opinion
LUCY: Doesn't mean she wanted it.

*LUCY: (To Dr Nettle) I'd say bite me...but you've already done that!

*LINDSAY: Bite Me!

*HELEN: Do I have the word DOPE stamped on my forehead Bobby, or is this because we know each other?

*LINDSAY: (Sarcastically) Gee, I'd hate to insult the intergrity of journalism (To other Lawyer) You're client should have saluted the cockroaches out of professional courtesy!

*JIMMY: It's normal size!

*LINDAY: You like twisted guys Helen
HELEN: You think?
LINDSAY: Well...
HELEN: Do you think I should see someone about it?
LINDSAY: Maybe
HELEN: Know any dark, twisted shrinks?

*HELEN: Father.
FATHER PATRICK: Kiss my ass!
HELEN: Excuse me?
PATRICK: I saw you on tv, heard what you said to the arch Diesis
HELEN: Father, I was acting out...I thought a nun had...she's my best friend, my roommate....look, I'm catholic.
PATRICK: With Catholics like you , who needs protestants?
HELEN: (sarcatically) Oh, now that's a soundbyte for tolerance...
BOBBY: Helen..
HELEN: Maybe you could kiss my a...
BOBBY AND LINDSAY: Helen!

*BOBBY: He just confessed?
SMILEY: That's correct
BOBBY: (Sarcastically) Did he hand you a cookie with this confession?

*HELEN: Go to the magistrate at Middlesx...he gives out warrants like gum.

*D.A SIMMONS: We had no evidence he wanted to engage in their legal services..
HILLER: No, he was calling to find out the price of fresh fruit. C'mon Mr Simmons

*LUCY: (on the phone after arguing with Ellenor) Donnel, Young, Dole and Slut....Frutt!

*LINDSAY: (to Bobby in 'Trees in the Forrest) I was afraid I might say that you're disfunctional. Look at you, famcy suits and a rat-infested office. You try to get ahead, but you fight yourself at the same time. I was afraid I might say that.

*JOEY HERRIC: Helen...can I call you Helen?
HELEN: No
JOEY: Ok...Dorothy

*JUDGE HILLER: (To Bobby) If I had to recuse you everytime you've slept with opposing counsil...
LINDSAY: (looking hurt, worried, annoyed and defensive) Hey!

*LINDSAY: Are you asking me if I think it's strange that you don't address your feelings?
BOBBY: Was I just insulted?

*ELLENOR: This is a no-brainer, what's stopping you?
LINDSAY: Some of us have brains.

*LINDSAY: (mockingly to Helen) 'She's testifying, she's testifying!' Aunty Em, come back! (In a normal voice) You sound like the the wicked witch of the west when you object.

*LUCY (to Bobby): I'm the 'cute as a button' type. Some guyz go for it. Figured you for models. Anyway's you're in trial. These are not issues you should be talking about as 'Miss Shake and Bake's' about to be cooked. (Bobby looks confused) You're due back in twenty, by the way. (She walks out, Bobby looks confused.)

*BOBBY (to Lindsay): I know. Can I ask you something? (she looks up, then looks back down in response) Are we a couple? (Lindsay looks up in shock) I mean a couple in waiting. We've kissed...What are we doing? Or not doing?
LINDSAY: What's going on? Are you dying? Why is this suddenly coming up?

*LUCY: Oh come on Ellenor. You look like a party girl. Lindsay, Bobby and Eugene act like they've never been to one.

*HELEN: You know what they say George, once you've seen a man carrying a severed head, it's hard to look at him again sexually.
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ALL FROM "TREES IN THE FORREST"

*LINDSAY: Eugene told me that you know
REBECCA: Know what?
LINDSAY: (casually) That Bobby and I used to sleep together. There, it's been said. Now, suppose I went to Bobby privately and made my request. And suppose he granted it. And then suppose it got out that he used to suck my elbows through the night. (Her and Rebecca are lauging and smiling) There'd be a mutiny. This way, out in the open...Bobby doesn't get accused of special favours does he? It's better for everybody I did it this way.

*ELLENOR: There's a rat running around.
JIMMY: In here?
REBECCA: No, in Washington, thats why we're all up on our desk, Big Head.

*LINDSAY (to Bobby): This law firm has rats. What a suprise.

*JIMMY: Look. May I say something, and then 'll shut up, I'll make it quick.
BOBBY: Go ahead.
JIMMY: Are you two (Bobby and Lindsay) sleeping together?
LINDSAY: (accusingly) Nice Rebecca!
REBECCA: I didn't tell

*BOBBY: If that's the way you feel, why do you stay?
LINDSAY: Because my best friends work here, I dont want to leave. And I'm in love with you.
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*EUGENE: The first thing they teach you in law school is to never fall in love with your client.
BOBBY: They don't teach you that
EUGENE: Well they should!

*BOBBY: You don't have your knife with you now, and I weigh more than a buck-forty
EDDIE: I wouldn't need my knife...I could pay yo to play dead

*LUCY: Definently wedding stress (Lindsay glares at her furiously) My first instinct was to say nothing..totally.

*ELLENOR: First of all..he says he didnt do it.
RICHARD (sarcastically): Oh, really..I didnt know that. Lets dismiss!

*RICHARD (to Helen): You used to sleep with one of those lawyers, you live with another...hell...maybe you're sleeping with her.

*EUGENE: Yeah, you said you knew Henry, but you didn't know he was having an affair with a cockroach.

*HELEN (to Lindsay): Is this because I walked in on you two this morning...? Cause I can cut back on that.

*HELEN: Lindsay, women dont like me, men just wanna sleep with me..I end up wanting to sleep with them...it's a vicious cycle.

*KITTLESON (to Jimmy): I love it when you say words like 'ain't.' Eloquence has a way of leaving me moist.
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FROM "FOOD CHAINS" SERIES TWO

*HELEN: "Who's feeding who crap now? If Bobby and I have a future you'll quit the firm. What are you...a cross between Cupid and Glenda the Good Witch of the North?
LINDSAY: Oh shut up
HELEN: Don't tell me to shut-up. If you love the guy, be a woman about it and claw my eyes out...I'd do it to you.

*EUGENE: Are we getting any money out of this?
ELLENOR: Not everything is about money Eugene...just ask Lindsay.
LINDSAY: You can bite me twice!

*LINDSAY: Haven't we moved up. We represent monkeys now. But, Hey, as long as Eugene gets to crack his nuts...